Government Fairytales
Once upon a time, there was a beautiful and powerful fairy.
Her job, as elected by all the lovely little mushroom dwellers, was to skippty-skop through the dangerous and dark halls of far off lands to protect them from all evil doers (both Foreign and Domestic).
Waiving her magic gavel, she gave throughout the land edicts with all of the other good and benevolent fairies, rules and regulations that would make this world a better place. Dip here – and poof – all the nasty stuff would be gone!
But wait – what is this – an evil wrongdoer mislead by another continued to practice the unsavory acts that had been “Regulated” just earlier in the sunny spring of La La Land.
“Oh my” she shrieked “How could this have happened? Who is responsible?”
“Not I” Shouted the important person in charge of Victimonia. “That was Big Regulation Sector Boss Tommy-Too-Late!”
“Not I” Shouted Tommy. For while enforcing regulations was technically his responsibility, Tommy had been flying around the planet showing how not dangerous the new snuffly-can’t breathe-non-emergency disease (and that the Oinkies were not dangerous to consume) was.
“Not I” Shouted the owner of the place where the crime had been committeed. “How I could I have known what happened on my property all of the time. There has been no edict passed!”
And so the beauteous and miraculous fairy raised her wand again. “I will regulate this until no more nasties are allowed in this land! (Except for the periodic toys and dried milk products – we need that for the Children). 
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If you have read this and think that it is just a “Fairy Tale” – think again.
Climb out of the pile of shit my friends – I deem you mushrooms no more.